Inspiration to Live!

Found this magnet today! It's going someplace where I see it OFTEN!! A good reminder of my word for the year.....LIVE!!

I Love Christmas!!!

My favorite place to be in my house!! And some of my paper snowflakes.

Something from Julia

I came across this little prayer/affirmation from Julia's book "Heart Steps" and thought I would share it. I need to read this everyday as so many of these ideas are things that I struggle with. It's hard to relax, let go and see where I end up!

"I am patient. I am able to live with ambiguity. I am able to allow situations to evolve and alter. I am able to await outcomes. I tolerate quiet periods of not knowing while solutions emerge and present themselves. I do not force solutions. I expect the successful working out of differences and difficulties. My heart is wise. It knows when to act and when non-action is the action to take. I trust my patient heart. I trust the power of containment."

Piano Recital

Just found another ancient newpaper article with my picture in it on the Worth Historical Society FB page! You know you're old when you're part of "history"!!
I'm in the front row, right next to the piano. I must've been smiling because I was happy it was over!! I remember how much I hated doing this!! Just about passed out from nerves!

Wordless Wednesday

Lies vs. Truth

I copied this off the wall of one of the booths at the One of a Kind show last weekend.

The Lie:
You are dirty. You have no worth. You have a past.
You have nothing to offer. You are trash.

The Truth:
You are beautiful because of where you have come
from, not in spite of it. You have unsurpassable
worth. You are good. You are made with a
purpose. You are valuable. You are loved.

'TEN' by Nic Askew

In a dream more real than his daytime
A grown man meets himself.

Himself at just ten. With the light
In his eyes. And the world in his heart.

But he can't.

And in the deafening silence he shakes
Uncontrollably. As the years
Of an unconsidered life spill over.

And in that silence everything changes.

Forever.

Perhaps the ten year old
Had been his
Very soul in disguise.

Come to shake him
From the prison of his daytime.

This is Me Today!

I hope to be looking different by tomorrow!!!

Misc. Art

Awhile ago Motherbear mentioned that I should surround myself with art that I had done in the past to help inspire me. Well, I came across this old sketchbook and thought I would post a few things. All were done in classes at the Center and some are still unfinished.

DEPTH

I am not deep.

But I do......
feel deeply
love deeply
yearn deeply
grieve deeply
hurt deeply
care deeply
desire deeply

I want to be...
deeply motivated
deeply loved
deeply desired
deeply involved
deeply commited
looking deeply into your eyes
dreaming deeply

I can be...
deeply vulnerable
deeply sensitive
deeply inspired
deeply dedicated
deeply loyal
deeply passionate
deeply saddened
deeply dense
deeply disturbed
deeply scared
deeply depressed
in too deep
in deep shit
or deep asleep

But I am not deep.

What the Hell is it???

I've been going thru massive avoidance of getting started on holiday prep. Feeling a lot of resentment about it all. Partly I'm just mad at myself for letting things go and falling so far behind. So, I gave myself permission to just doodle for a little bit before I start cleaning 2 bathrooms (my least favorite chore!). This is what came out. What is it??? Horrendously ugly, that's what!! I think it's my inner anger and resentment, wanting to just fly away and say "Screw it"!! Hee hee! I'm feeling better already!!!

First Snow of 2011

I don't know about you but, it seems mighty early for this to me!!

Missing Mom

Eleanor June Peterson
1-15-1927 to 11-9-2009

Some Family

Just couldn't resist posting these Halloween photos of my niece, her boyfriend and their baby. Wesley will be 2 in January.

Happy Halloween!

This photo turned up recently on the Worth Historical Society's FB page. Worth is the town I grew up in. That's me in the back, 2nd from the left. I was supposed to be a "Space Girl". I was wearing a silver skirt and cape that my mom made and some kind of goofy silver boots. I remember that I hated not getting to be something "cuter". And what's that farmer doing with his arm around me?!?! Anyway, this was a Christmas program but, since we're in costume, thought I would post it for Halloween!!

Dr. Seuss

We weren't allowed to take pictures at the Dr. Seuss exhibit but I found a few on the web from his secret, personal collection. These were paintings he didn't want displayed until after he was dead. What an imagination he had!!!!

Art Therapy

BLUE
One of my favorite colors.
One of my least favorite moods.

Begin Now

"Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand----and melting like a snowflake."

---Marie Beynon Ray---

A Beach "Fix"

I had a wonderful time in Green Bay this weekend. It was great reconnecting with a friend I hadn't seen in an embarassingly long time!! Since I last saw her she has gotten divorced, remarried, had MAJOR health issues and almost died. It was amazing the way we were able to just pick up where we left off, like no time had passed at all. We just seem to click in so many ways and I am extremely glad that I went!! But I missed my "glimpse" of Lake Michigan on the way up!! I don't know if I was lost in thought, distracted by semis, too into the music coming out of my CD player or WHAT?!?!? I was quite bummed when I realized I had passed it without noticing. So, on Sunday when I left GB, instead of heading south out of the city, I drove the 23 miles east that take you to the shore of the great lake. I went to the beach in Algoma. I have been craving a beach "fix" for a long time anyway----have been meaning to get to the dunes forever!!! So I really soaked it all in!! Took off my shoes and socks, rolled up my pants and went wading. I'd been dying to dig my toes in some sand!! It was a bit icy but it felt good!!! I wandered down the beach for awhile and then just sat in the sand for a long time just "being"----watching the waves and the sand and the sun and the rocks and the geese and the bugs crawling on the rocks---feeling the wind ruffling my hair and the goosebumps that ALMOST wanted to pop up on my arms. Everything else in life just drained away----time was suspended-----nothing else mattered except sitting in the sand reconnecting with Mother Earth in all her gorgeous and unpredictable glory. I forgot how good it feels to get away----to leave behind thoughts of paying the bills, doing the laundry, buying the groceries, cleaning the house. I don't know how long I would have sat there if I didn't have to drive home to Chicago. I think I would like to have stayed until it got too cold and dark!! Maybe someday I'll get that chance. I left behind some "rock art" for someone to find, collected some rocks for myself (CANNOT go to the beach without collecting something!!) but had nothing to put them in. So I filled up my shoes. Now they are laying in the backseat of my car----a little piece of the beach. I can't believe I forgot to add "Beach Bum" to my list of imaginary lives!!!

Boy, Would I Like to Go to This!!

New Doors

I have a kundalini yoga dvd that I started doing earlier this year. And then, for some reason I forgot about it and didn't do any yoga for weeks! Yesterday I started again and it feels sooooo good! When I get done I just know that I have done something really good for myself! And at the end they say,"You have opened new doors. Your homework is to walk through them." Lets all walk through some new doors today!!!

I Need to Read this Everyday!

Wake-Up Call!

Once in awhile you NEED one of these!!!

co*lab*o*ra*tion

First of all I have to tell you that this is basically an ad but I have a reason for wanting to share it with you. I have recently found myself having an intense love affair with music---I can't get enough of it!! There is a young man named Ramin Niroomand who has some piano solos on YouTube and I think he is incredibly inspiring. So I was watching this trailer and when I saw the word collaboration and the definition I thought WOW!! That's what all of us in the AW tribe are---a collaboration and we are creating something beautiful!! We seem to have created this place where love just overflows all over the place and it is has been so incredible!! And then I had a mini-epiphany.....I realized that you have ALL managed to wrench my heart WIDE OPEN and everything I have inside of me is pouring out! The REAL me!! The me who has always been held in check by fear, expectations and social "norms". I SO want you to know me and I SO want to be known!!! THANK YOU!!

The Screaming Censor

I didn't give my censor a name when we started on the AW journey----I foolishly thought that she wasn't enough of a concern to bother. Silly me!!! I have a challenge this week and she is literally screaming in my ear---it's deafening!!! She is one nasty *itch!!! You see, the Make Your Mark Journals go on display today and for the rest of the week. On Saturday there is a reception. It is finally sinking in that MY journal will be there will all those other journals by other artists. My censor is screaming that mine will be compared with the others. And of course she says, "Yours doesn't measure up!". She is asking WHY I didn't pass it around---now almost all the work is mine---there to be judged. Why didn't I do this and why DID I do that? she wants to know. I will try to strangle her. I will slash her with an x-acto knife!! I will bludgeon her!! So many ways to silence her. Maybe the simplest would just be a piece of duct tape over her huge mouth!!! I need my affirmations! I need to look at all the positives that came out of doing that journal. First of all I FINISHED it!! That alone is a big accompishment--I am famous for unfinished projects. I also made a promise to myself to NOT tear any pages out, no matter how much I hated them, and I didn't!! I learned something from every single page I did! I learned the positive affects of the DAILY PRACTICE of making art. But most of all, I fell in love with the book and what it contained. I fell in love with myself a little bit. That book contains some of what is the very essence of who I am! And I must continue to love ME!!!! So censor, whatever your name is.....I don't give a *bleep* what you say!!!! I did my best!!! It will be fine!

Confession

Ok, I confess---I love reality TV shows. Well...at least SOME reality TV shows. I don't really watch very much TV and, when I do, it tends to be HGTV, The History Channel (love those American Pickers and Pawn Stars!!) or the Science Channel (Through the Wormhole is awesome!!). But the one show that I am totally addicted to (and I'm so excited---it starts tomorrow!!) is SURVIVOR!!! I NEVER get tired of it!! To me, it's like a sociology lesson. A group of people all start out determined to be ruthless and just play to win that million bucks. But as time goes on, they form relationships, whether they want to or not and it gets harder and harder for them to base their decisions strictly on smart game-play. It's hard to stab someone in the back when they have "had your back" for awhile. My son gets so frustrated because he is SURE he could play the game ruthlessly. I am quite sure that if he were in that situation he would find out it ain't so easy. I guess what this all means to me is that there is hope for the human race. That we can talk a good game but, when we are put in a postion of living and working with people for a period of time, we create bonds and we find it very hard to think with our heads and not our hearts. And I think that's a GOOD thing!!

@#$%@&!!$#@!!! Camera!!

Based on some thinking about my AW check-in, some of the comments, an email from Elena (I will respond soon!), I spent a good part of the afternoon doodling away on a goofy "split personality" self portrait. I really wanted to take a picture of it in progress but my camera has decided it doesn't want to take pictures the last couple days! It's done this before and, somehow, has recovered on it's own---very mysterious. I hope that happens again soon!!!

The Patterns in Nature are Infinite!!!

I had a wonderfully inspiring walk this morning!! I wish I lived closer to the woods! I never tire of seeing Mother Natures artwork!!!

Trying to Keep up the Daily Practice

While working on the Make Your Mark journal project I really started to feel the positive effects of creating on a daily basis. A combination of discipline and practice which I usually think of as "dirty words" and a feeling of being more fearless were what I feel I gained from the whole experience. Now that it's done, I'm TRYING to continue that discipline and daily practice. I bought a small brown sketchbook with brown paper pages and have been doing these pen and ink mandalas. Any small thing I do, as long as I do SOMETHING is progress in the right direction. You know, I used to go for days and weeks intending to get into the studio and create without ever actually getting it done. Nowdays, I can hardly keep myself out of there, even if it's just to clean or organize things!!! I LOVE the shift that I'm feeling!!!

The Virtue Trap

"An artist must have downtime, time to do nothing. Defending our right to such time takes courage, conviction, and resiliency. Such time, space, and quiet will strike our family and friends as a withdrawal from them. It is. For an artist withdrawal is necessary. Without it, the artist in us feels vexed, angry, out of sorts. If such deprivation continues, our artist becomes sullen, depressed, hostile. We eventually become like cornered animals, snarling at our family and friends to leave us alone and stop making unreasonable demands. We are the ones making unreasonable demands. We expect our artist to be able to function without giving it what it needs to do so. An artist requires the upkeep of creative solitude. An artist requires the healing of time alone. Without this period of recharging, our artist becomes depleted. Over time, it becomes something worse than out of sorts Death threats are issued."

This is just one of the reasons why I LOVE Julia Cameron and The Artist's Way!! She is just sheer genius (in my humble opinion!).

Illustration Love!!!

My whole life I have had a love affair with children's picture books. Some of the illustrations I remember from my childhood have had a profound impact on me and my love of art. When I was much, much younger I thought I would grow up to write and illustrate children's books but, somewhere along the way, I realized that I cannot draw people and figured that that wouldn't work too well!!! NOW, I realize that it would take some intensive life-drawing classes and lots of practice and then, I probably could draw people!! But, in the meantime, I thought I would share a few illustrations from some of the books that my son and I loved to read when he was small. These are from Eric Carle, Jan Brett, Jane Hissey, Chris Van Allsburg, Tasha Tudor and Constanza Droop. ENJOY!!!!